Friday, June 03, 2005

Plumbing Problems

The plumbing in the Vatican is terrible. I knew the plumbing was old, but you wouldn’t believe what I have to put up with each day.

Not only is the water pressure horrible, but my shower water is either scalding hot or freezing cold. It’s tough to find that balance on the shower knob. One degree to the right or left will leave me shivering cold or jumping out of the way. I haven’t quite mastered it yet.

My sink also clogs up every week. One of my Cardinals suggested that I stop shaving in front of the sink. He thinks my hair is clogging the drain. I’ve taken his advice and started shaving in the shower.

Shaving in the shower is a much different experience. I bought one of those “fog proof” mirrors, but the darn thing doesn’t even work. The mirror is always foggy—-with or without the water running. I end up having to shave blindly and pray that I don’t cut myself.

Such is the life of a Pope in the old Vatican.

14 Comments:

Blogger Tan Lucy Pez said...

Yeah. I've heard that old guys have plumbing problems.

6/03/2005 12:15 AM  
Blogger dAAve said...

Your Holiness

I didn't realize that nazi's actually shaved.

yours in service
HP

6/03/2005 12:28 AM  
Blogger Scott W said...

Cleaning a mirror with anti-freeze will keep it from fogging up.

6/03/2005 1:25 AM  
Blogger The Lazy Iguana said...

Here is a trick that scuba divers use to prevent their masks from fogging up underwater.

Spit on the mirror. Do not hawk a loogie, but apply a generous amount of sliva. Then rub the spit all over the mirror. Then quickly rinse the mirror off. One quick dunk underwater will work.

I use this method on my mask whenever I am in the water - it has never fogged.

Think of it as the ultimate blessing for your mirror!

6/03/2005 1:26 AM  
Blogger Gwon said...

As the Pope, you could simply not shave and start a new trend. Beards are in and a beard on Pope Joe would blow minds.

Bless your blog.

6/03/2005 1:49 AM  
Blogger GodlessMom said...

Most Holy Father,

I have an extra pipe snake, would you like to have it? I've heard that the Rain-X stuff you apply to windshields to make rain water bead and roll off will work wonders with a shaving mirror.

Your Servant,
GodlessMom

6/03/2005 4:11 AM  
Blogger imagoner said...

Pope Dear,
I really feel for ya. I have a hard time shaving standing up and many times I will sit down and shave on the shower floor, but that always leaves me feeling like I'm inviting bacteria in my bum, or worse, my ta-ta. Being a Queen I am in great distain of cleaning my bathrooms myself, therefore they aren't done often. In these days of bankrupt kingdoms though, what is a Queen to do?

Yours Regally,
Queen Olive

6/03/2005 5:12 AM  
Blogger Sehbai said...

I have always shaved in the shower, its so much better. After the shower, don't forget to double check in the mirror as there are ALWAYS a couple of spots left that need some work.

6/03/2005 7:49 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Are you living in a funny farm?

6/03/2005 11:20 AM  
Blogger alena said...

Hey, I have enjoyed...your blog is informative - even entertaining.

I have a halloween sites. They pretty much covers costumes and masks related stuff.

Thanks again and I'll be sure to bookmark you.

10/05/2005 4:02 AM  
Blogger Elizabeth Green said...

Suck it up, big boy. Consider the fact that you are suffering along with Christ. Offer it up for cancer victims or something.

11/27/2005 8:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Queen Olive, I suggest my home cleaning services? You've not experienced the best unless you've hired CC Services. Shine your shoes to shine your seating needs; whatever throne you're talking about. The Browns had their intake valves shined, why not you? Don't accept medieval standards as the norm. Come with the best

4/09/2006 8:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sluming. That reminds me of that Paris Hotel where I had to put coins to run the shower.

5/16/2006 5:24 AM  
Anonymous Plumbing Supply Austin said...

Plumbing is critical these days, people expect me to take a bath every day and to put on clean underwear every morning. I am really thankful to you for providing this unique information. Please keep sharing more and more information...

1/27/2012 5:38 AM  

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