Thursday, August 25, 2005

Sexual Harassment Meeting

All Vatican employees had to attend a two-hour sexual harassment meeting yesterday. Everyone was forced to watch a series of videos and then read and sign a contract that says we attended.

At one point, I tried to sneak out--claiming Papal infallibility--but that didn’t seem to work.

I then mentioned that I needed to pray so that I could release some souls from purgatory. That didn’t work either. The H.R. Department said the souls could wait two more hours while I watched the videos.

I then mentioned the three bean burritos that I had just eaten for lunch--and that quickly got me excused.

21 Comments:

Blogger A Little Bar of Soap said...

You are a FILTHY man!

8/25/2005 3:51 AM  
Blogger Indianrunner12 said...

Who would WANT to sexually harass 80 year old nuns?

8/25/2005 4:27 AM  
Anonymous potsy said...

Hey, don't you listen to your lawyers? You need to show that you're serious about sexual harassment stuff, or the lawyers will eat you alive.

8/25/2005 4:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

sexual harassment in the vatican? aren't you all the same sex there? it must be the gayest country

8/25/2005 5:26 AM  
Blogger Anna said...

Praise Jesus for bean burritos!

8/25/2005 4:14 PM  
Blogger dAAve said...

Your Holiness

Good on ya!
I'm all for Sexual Harassment Training. No matter how hard I try, I'm never really good enough at it. I'm quite surprised you weren't actually teaching the course your owndamnself.


yours in service
HP

8/25/2005 5:16 PM  
Blogger 357martini said...

Vatican named in sex abuse lawsuit

Canadian Press

TORONTO — The Vatican and the College of Cardinals are among those named in a sex abuse lawsuit to be filed this week in Cornwall, Ont.

LeDroit Beckett, a London, Ont.-based law firm, is filing the suit on behalf of Andrien St. Louis, who claims he was abused by a Roman Catholic bishop and priest.

Retired bishop Eugene LaRocque, who lives in Windsor, Ont., and a deceased priest, Donald Scott, are named in the suit.

The Holy See, the College of Cardinals, Cardinal Aloysius Ambrozic of Toronto, the Diocese of Alexandria-Cornwall and the Diocese of London are accused of negligence and vicarious liability of their employees.

None of these allegations have been proven in court.

Ledroit has scheduled a news conference for Tuesday in Cornwall to announce the new suits.

The Alexandria-Cornwall diocese already faces two $3.1-million lawsuits alleging sexual abuse by a former priest.

The lawsuits name current Bishop Paul-Andre Durocher and his predecessor, LaRocque, for alleged negligence involving two plaintiffs, Albert Lalonde and Robert Renshaw.

Lalonde and Renshaw both claim they were victimized by Rev. Charles MacDonald, 72, who now lives in the eastern Ontario community of Glen Robertson.

A Cornwall-area lawyer, Jacques Leduc, also faces a $3.1-million lawsuit from plaintiff Stuart Labelle.

Last month, Ledroit announced 10 other civil lawsuits against clergy, school boards and the government.

Alleged abuse victims Ron and George Glaude also came forward saying they are the nephews of the judge leading an inquiry into long-standing allegations of sexual abuse in Cornwall.

Judge Normand Glaude has said he doesn't know if the two men are part of his extended family, but that the issue shouldn't be dealt with until public hearings begin, likely at the start of next year.

Allegations that a sex abuse ring ran for 50 years were investigated by police in the city for years under the name Project Truth.

They laid 114 charges against 15 high-profile men in the 1990s, but the courts ultimately convicted just one man who had no connection to the alleged sex ring.

At the end of the investigation, police said they found no evidence of a pedophile ring in the city.

The Ontario government has said it hopes a public inquiry will bring peace to the divided community.

Alain Seguin, co-ordinator of the group Coalition for Action Cornwall, estimates 1,000 men have been sexually abused in the city since the 1950s.

An affidavit sworn in 1996 by Ron Leroux, a 58-year-old painting contractor who lived in Cornwall but is now based in Maine, says as a boy he witnessed a "clan" of pedophiles abusing young boys in a variety of ways.

Leroux, who claimed he was abused by several priests, said the "ritual went on on a weekly basis."

8/25/2005 7:36 PM  
Blogger 357martini said...

I'm fucking handing you a gem here popo...now fucking roll with it already...this is the third fucking time....whaddda I need to do? request a response in triplicate...................

8/25/2005 7:49 PM  
Blogger Annie said...

They have good Tex-mex in Rome?

8/26/2005 12:21 AM  
Blogger Tan Lucy Pez said...

Never mind Tex-mex, they have Sex-mex. Ergo, Sexual Harassment meetings.

Joey, Joey, Joey, don't be bothering the altar boys. Just don't.

8/26/2005 12:59 AM  
Blogger bschneider5 said...

Hey JB, I attended a similar trainig class myself some time ago...How boring can you get. Especially when everybody pretends they dont like grab assing, which I'm sure you can relate. Her, I hae a special request. You have blessed my blog before, and cast satan from it, ut when he left, the SPAMMERS started coming around. Can you come back around and splash some water on them or something? Any help would be great. Bradsblog

8/26/2005 3:25 AM  
Anonymous Georg said...

At your age?

8/26/2005 4:12 AM  
Blogger jamwall said...

naughty naughty man! don't even start with what you've been wearing under your papal robe!!!

*vomiting*

8/26/2005 4:48 AM  
Blogger actonbell said...

LOL! A sneaky gas-attack! Way to go:)

8/26/2005 11:08 PM  
Blogger Indianrunner12 said...

Viagra?

8/27/2005 2:47 AM  
Blogger Jamie Dawn said...

A burrito with three beans...

8/27/2005 2:59 AM  
Blogger Dex2177 said...

Well of course the HR dept. would say that. That's where Satan trains his staff.

8/28/2005 8:16 AM  
Blogger Pseudo-intellectual lunatic said...

cool blog

9/02/2005 2:45 PM  
Anonymous Hale McKay(Mike) said...

Three bean burritos work every time. Great post!

9/10/2005 4:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

mm I want a burrito:(

10/12/2005 11:18 AM  
Blogger Logan Furniture Movers said...

cool one

7/01/2013 12:57 PM  

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