Saturday, April 30, 2005

My First Pilgrimage

I really hate traveling, but it’s part of my new job. I’m heading to Bari, Italy for the 24th National Eucharistic Conference. Try saying that ten times quickly.

My trip beings on May 29th, so I’m getting a luxury suite at a nearby hotel. But because of my celebrity status, I’m using a fake name. I know it’s breaking a commandment to lie, but what’s a Pope to do? I don’t want any trouble.

I’ve also requested the hotel give me a full bar of soap in my bathroom. I’m tired of those little credit card sized soaps that they always give me. The little things always dissolve before I can even wash my legs. But now that I’m Pope, I can request a full bar of soap and actually get it. Believe that.

Now it’s time to lather up with some of the Cool Water Cologne that Snoop sent me. I have to go out tonight.

17 Comments:

Blogger dAAve said...

You got a new job? Where ya working now?

4/30/2005 1:07 AM  
Blogger Ms. Pickle said...

hey pope
im glad you have decided you can take charge of these things. you demand that irish spring!!!

4/30/2005 1:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your holiness,

Beware!

There is lots of bad Karma in Bari. Legend has it that
Celestino V came from Bari. And you know what happened to him. He resigned after 5 months because every form of corruption had infested the Church. He became the prisoner of Boniface VIII and was later assinated.

Beware the Ides of Bari!

Peter II

4/30/2005 1:21 AM  
Blogger Kaci said...

Watch it with the Cool Water. You might attract some babes and be tempted to invite them into your suite. Remember you're holy status! No woman is worth your ruin. Tha papparazzi is always around. Keep your guard up for anyone trying to snap uncandid shots of you with a camera.

4/30/2005 2:05 AM  
Blogger Rochelle said...

Hey Pope Buddy,

Thanks for dropping by! Keep up the good work.

Rochelle

4/30/2005 3:13 AM  
Blogger whatever1003 said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4/30/2005 3:17 AM  
Blogger whatever1003 said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4/30/2005 3:37 AM  
Blogger Pope Benedict XVI said...

Thanks for the warning.

I've never used the laundry bag for my hat, but it's not a bad idea.

4/30/2005 3:57 AM  
Blogger pepseeh said...

what's up, pope dude? you totally deserve the irish spring.

be home by 12, homie.

4/30/2005 3:58 AM  
Blogger Pope Benedict XVI said...

Yeah, I originally asked for Irish Spring soap to show that I'm diverse, but I settled on som Origin's minty soap.

It's the bomb. Makes me feel so fresh and so clean--clean.

4/30/2005 4:06 AM  
Blogger actonbell said...

Hey, you're not the humble monk anymore, carving demonic figures on your messoricord--I can't spell, but you have better things to do than deface the underside of a pew, now! Of course you can have a real bar of soap. Knock yourself out.

4/30/2005 4:27 AM  
Blogger Wolfman said...

I'm glad we are balding together.

4/30/2005 7:05 AM  
Blogger imagoner said...

Cool Water AND a friend of my homie Snoop (who I will always remember as the Doggy Dog), you are really a man after my own heart! Well, except for that pesky abstinince thing--darn my luck!

And about the lie---don't worry! God decided you should be the Pope and I think your entitled to some degree of bending the commandmants...

Always Yours,
Queen O

4/30/2005 7:51 AM  
Blogger akiey said...

What's up Pope!
About booking hotels under a diff name, how about adopting some names from the many folks that post messages here. Pick one for every hotel you book into if all fails just say you're Bond, James Bond & they'll believe that:)!

4/30/2005 10:21 AM  
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10/08/2005 4:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'll have to keep that in mind gym shower

10/24/2005 11:57 AM  

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