Saturday, December 24, 2005

Fashion is Next to Godliness

The media loves talking about my Gucci sunglasses and Prada shoes. They think that if you’re old and holy, you shouldn’t wear name-brand clothes.

Well, forgive me for being fashionable. It’s not like I dress outrageously—like Bjork. There’s no sin in being fashionable. In fact, one could argue that it’s a ghastly sin to be unfashionable.

Anyway, I was a little upset this afternoon when I received an email from one of my agents. The article talks about my fashion and then states:

“The 78-year-old Benedict lacks John Paul’s natural charisma, and the trappings of Vatican splendor may be a way to compensate.”

Excuse me? I exhibit “Vatican splendor” to compensate for my lack of charisma? Are you kidding?

I’m not even sure how to begin to respond . . .

First, I love how the article has to refer back to my age. Yes, I’m 78—get over it. How many 78-year olds do you know that wear Gucci and Prada? And I’m talking about non-gay guys.

Second, I’ve only been Pope for 8-months. John Paul II had charisma, but he was Pope for nearly 27-years. Give me a little time. I’ll show you charisma.

Third, I don’t need my fashion to compensate for anything. I like to wear clothes that make me feel good. Enough about it.

I’m sorry for venting, but I’m just hurt. I guess I need to get used to all this negative criticism.

The only redemptive part of the article is that writer made mention about my “sporty around-the-ankle” hem:

During Benedict’s first public appearances, his cassock was way above the ankle, revealing white socks and bright red footwear. The hem was soon lowered a few inches, although he still prefers a sporty around-the-ankle look instead of having the cassock draped over the shoes.

Yes, I do prefer the sporty look. It’s nice to know someone noticed my sporty hemline. My tailor will be pleased. Check out the pic:

papal hemline


Blogger Tan Lucy Pez said...

Merry Christmas Your Holiness!

You can wear anything you want. 'Cause you wear it well.

God Bless. (Actually I hope God never finds out about this blog.)

12/24/2005 6:25 PM  
Blogger schnoodlepooh said...

You should be commended for being 78 and sporty. Not that many people your age are sporty, and even fewer popes!

12/24/2005 6:37 PM  
Blogger dddragon said...

Don't they realize that a person can trip if their cassock is too long? Besides, hemlines go up and down all the time.

12/24/2005 7:37 PM  
Blogger Barney said...

It's probably smart to wear red shoes. When you get up after a hard night of dining and drinking and are still sleepy, you can easily find them in the darkness of your closet.

We celebrities have to stick together.

12/24/2005 7:59 PM  
Anonymous Leanne N said...

Merry Christmas your Holiness, You're doing a wonderful job..As for lack of charisma..You have nothing to worry about. =) You shine a whole new much anticipated light on things..Take care.

12/24/2005 10:55 PM  
Anonymous churchgirl said...

the devil wears prada, or so a book title goes...
if you're still smarting from that article, i'd skip the nytimes. will the comparisons ever stop?

"Wearing a bishop's mitre and cape, both in gold, Benedict stuck to his prepared remarks but also showed that he has lost all the apparent hesitancy of his early days as pope: He seemed relaxed and warm, waving to acknowledge the cheers, even though to some in the crowd it seemed as much the first Christmas without the charismatic John Paul as the first with the more reserved Benedict."

12/25/2005 10:14 PM  
Anonymous The Pagan said...

Dear Mr. Pope,
In the wise words of Elvis Costello, "Oh I used to be disgusted, and now I try to be amused, but since their wings have gotten rusted, you know the angels wanna wear my red shoes."

12/27/2005 2:43 PM  

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