Monday, October 24, 2005

Accused of Not Washing My Hands

A Cardinal accused me of not washing my hands in the restroom today. I was so insulted. I always wash my hands. In fact, I even refuse to touch the door when leaving the restroom. I push the door open with my knee instead. This has caused some dirty marks on my white robe, but my dry cleaners always get the stains out.


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10/24/2005 10:49 PM  
Anonymous c.t. said...

Maybe carry around a little anti-bacterial soap bottle. That should shut those bastards up.

10/24/2005 11:38 PM  
Blogger dAAve said...

Your Holiness

C'mon Johnny! Tell us the truth. We all know why your knees are so stained. And it ain't got nothing to do with Cardinals.

yours in service
(former altar boi)

10/25/2005 2:10 AM  
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10/25/2005 5:13 AM  
Blogger Anna said...

I saw a thing on 60 minutes that tested the germ levels in bathrooms. They found that the toilet seat and the door handle are a few of the cleanest places. The dirtiest thing was the floor. So don't let your robe touch the floor.
Thou shalt ALWAYS wash they hands after using the restroom! (this was in Commandments 11-15 that Moses accidentally dropped.)

10/25/2005 3:15 PM  
Blogger Anna said...

OMG! Naughty higher powered!

10/25/2005 3:18 PM  
Blogger jamwall said...

always have a container of rubber gloves handy, your holiness!

10/25/2005 6:21 PM  
Blogger dddragon said...

How dare anyone accuse you of anything!!

10/25/2005 10:42 PM  
Anonymous The Pagan said...

Dear Mr. Pope,
I'm reminded of an old Army joke. A West Point grad and an NCO are in the latrine taking a leak. They finish and the NCO turns to leave. The Officer says to the NCO, "Sergeant, at West Point they teach us to wash our hands after we urinate." The NCO replies, "Sir, with all due respect at the NCO Academy the teach us not to piss on our hands."
-The Pagan

10/25/2005 11:41 PM  
Blogger jack said...


10/30/2005 12:11 AM  

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