Monday, May 02, 2005

Vatican Restrooms

The toilet paper dispensers in the Vatican are really annoying. I can only wiggle out like three little squares at a time. It takes forever to get out of the restroom.

I’ve managed to cheat the system a bit by squeezing the cardboard tube into an oval to help me roll more paper off, but that only allows me like five or six more squares at a time. It’s quite troubling.

To make matters worse, the paper squares are only one-ply. Can you believe that? What sick individual developed one-ply toilet paper? Did he think one-ply would work? Did he think one-ply would be comfortable? I’d like to see him try using it. See how he likes it.

Well, I don’t really want to see him using it. I’m not into that kind of thing. And I’m not judging anyone who is into that. It’s none of my business. Different strokes for different folks.

7 Comments:

Blogger Spidey/Tato said...

be grateful for the 1 X 3 tissue... however if i were u i'd stay clear of some dodgy foods...cause u may need more than 2ply when that time arises

5/02/2005 4:39 PM  
Blogger Spidey/Tato said...

height of disgust by the way is ur finger pokin thru the tissue during a wipin moment...i suggest u boycott/strike till they think better

5/02/2005 6:49 PM  
Blogger Jamie Dawn said...

You just need a box of those personal wet wipes...with no alcohol in them of course.

5/02/2005 8:53 PM  
Blogger dAAve said...

Story with a spin. Quite charmin'.

Remind me when we meet next month NOT to be shakin' your hand.

Gotta scat.

5/03/2005 1:19 AM  
Blogger Esther Kustanowitz said...

I have it on good authority that he who created one-ply toilet paper is actually going to hell. Is that true? I mean, I heard it on the streets of NYC, but you're like, the Pope and stuff, so thought I'd ask.

5/03/2005 5:14 AM  
Blogger BarbaraFromCalifornia said...

Ah...That old one vs two ply dilema..It can make you calculate, smerk, philosophisize, and in your case, pontificate!

5/04/2005 9:40 PM  
Blogger Whitney said...

I never understood one-ply...if it was created in an effort to save paper, it was all for naught. Cause you use at least twice as much just trying to keep the distance, if you know what I mean.

But perhaps you should use this dilemma to extend grace to those stinky people you mention in another post...perhaps they can't help it because they, too, have access only to one-ply...and well, they are suffering the ill effects of it.

5/05/2005 5:14 AM  

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